CAN'T FIND YOUR KEYS? COULD BE THAT GUN POINTED AT YOUR BRAIN!!!

Your BRAIN is being held HOSTAGE! It surely DOES want to be there for You, but as it's REALLY BUSY, right now, trying to figure out a way to RID itself of the VERMIN that You KEEP SENDING IT'S WAY, it'll have to get back to You. See, it's once BUCOLIC, CLEAN STREETS? (Remember those days?).  Well, as You've been sending DANGEROUS THUGS to live up in Your ELITE ZIP CODE neighborhood ON THE HILL and they've turned it into the WILD WEST? Or better yet? A Dark Ages Europe? (Yeah. THAT'S BAD!!!!). Seems, You can't remember even what You had for BREAKFAST, without a STRUGGLE, let alone remember that You've left half Your wardrobe at the dry cleaners for over 3 months and it's about to be hauled off to a Thrift Store!!!


But Don't PANIC!!! Your brain, as I stated WANTS to work for YOU!!! I know MINE suddenly started working AGAIN, at the ripe age of 48 when I employed some FIERCE WARRIOR ALLIES to CLEAN my Cerebral Inner City OUT. Who KNEW I could still THINK and that Detroit might be BEAUTIFUL AGAIN!


Well. Let's handle One Problem at a time, shall We?


So, first. NIX THE DANGED COFFEE, will ya?!!! It severely DEHYDRATES your brain, which interferes with the function of all your systems. It also curtails the absorption of necessary vitamins which are required for, gee? EVERYTHING!!!!


Second. NIX THE DEAD FOOD. You might as well put a gag and a pillow case over this fluffy kitty's head to show a picture that would most accurately depict what that SLUDGE PRODUCING DEAD FOOD is doing to your brain cells. NO WONDER You can't find Your keys! And not to mention, remember why You tied that string around Your finger. YOU DO REMEMBER WHY You did that, r-i-g-h-t?! Awwww,  Man! You Forgot, ALREADY?


Tsk, tsk & Smh.


Third. Eat a variety of colorFULL food, researching to discover what will not only sustain Your life but help You THRIVE. Then You can also add Gingko Biloba, Flaxseed Oil, Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Club Moss, Ginseng, Eleuthero, Gota Kola, Coconut Oil, and whatever ELSE Your own research will discover. The JOY of natural remedies is that they WORK and they all work TOGETHER, without the Nasty Side EFFECTS.


Fourth. Do some Push Ups. Well, yeah, exercise is EXCELLENT for brain health, but I mean do some CRANIAL PUSH UPS. Challenge Yourself to do NEW THINGS!!! Take a math class! I'm NOT KIDDING. Meditate. Notice little movements that You ordinarily overlook. Like tying your shoelace or putting a fork to Your mouth. Talk to New People!!!


Soon? That Little Kitty will be PACKIN' AN OOZIE and WATCHIN' YOUR BACK, every time You need to remember more than where Your back is.


Oh! Yeah. There it is. Behind You - like this little memory problem soon will be, also.