WHEN SILENCE IS NO LONGER AWKWARD BUT GOLDEN

We began our relationship OVERWHELMED by a flood of EXUBERANCE. Both my husband and I confessed that our fall into love felt like plunging into an ocean with no fear of drowning. We waxed eloquently for hours on end about what we meant to each other.

But that's not necessary anymore. It took me some time to accept this evolution of Our love, as I had learned a Hollyweird version of what True Love looks like. Endless Syrupi-ness. That's a problem for a Real Black Man, cause? My husband issssss a MAN, not Dustin Hoffman in Blackface. He CAN TALK, and very WELL, to the degree that he ASTONISHES ME REGULARLY when he does, but? Whatever he says, including the most poignant confessions of continuing love for me? He tends to get out in 3 sentences or less. He's so efficient that even I don't require more. 

Now some Men are natural poets who can make a rose garden actually smell like a NYC Subway tunnel, but most Men? Kinda like the quiet of just

living......

Whoa. I had never tried THAT before, at any point in my life. I mean I have been enjoying my life for a couple steady decades now, however it's been with a WHOLE LOT OF TALKING!!!!! But here I am in a MARRIAGE that looks like, LOOKS LIKE and FEEEEEEEEELS LIKE it's made by Allah to LAST. To continue droning on about the OBVIOUS, well, even to me, that started to seem a bit RIDICULOUSLY REDUNDANT. I don't neeeeeeeed continuous affirmation as our love is oh so THERE and I realize, as Hollyweird movies deliberately don't convey - I am not in a union with my TWIN, cause I ain't a Lesbian, and my husband isn't a Homo. We married and have risen HIGHER by learning how to love beyond Our limited realms. He has increased his healthy food intake with my gentle reminder that his presence in our family is PRECIOUS. While EYE? I may be more communicative, but my husband?

He just lives.

Wow......

So? I allowed myself to learn from him, and it's even MORE BLISSFULLY PEACEFUL than constantly talking. Who KNEW? I'm in the kitchen or the diningroom or whichever room with him drinking in the presence of him, all to myself, and it makes it feel even more INTENSE. Cause it's not a temporary, or even a HOPE for a committed relationship. It is

MY REALITY.

No need to keep stating the obvious, though every now and then, when we do, it is so much more profound cause there's NOT A DOUBT. There's Nothing to prove to each other cause our proof is our very  Life, together.

Yes. This kind of silence is worth the wait, and the passing up of every fool before I met a Man who is confident being my King, and I as his one and only Queen.

LET'S TALK POOP!!!!

Face it. You have a diagnostic high tech digestive system that will LET YOU KNOW when somethin' ain't right within. Your very serotonin level (that's the PRIMARY HAPPINESS HORMONE) is 95% created in YOUR GUT!!!! So should Your innards be infested with toxic CRAP, so compacted it no longer can process the steady onslaught, cause it's CLOGGED? Your whole body is then a TOXIC DUMPSITE, not only making Three Mile Island look like the a tropical paradise, but making You feel like

crap.

But how can You tell for sure that Your entire Immune System is under siege, too weak to combat a growing legion of Cancer Cells, and other debilitative malfunctions? You can't slice open Your gut and most Western medical tests don't detect little cancerous growths, till the tumor is so big the doctor could pay You for confirming what his test finally picked up, 2 days before You've died.

More accurate evidence of something wrong is in YOUR POOOOOOOOP. Ideally? You shouldn't be passin' or straining to get logs complete with smelly wildlife out Your shooter. You MUST (notice I didn't say 'should') You MUST reach the optimum of crap elimination of 20 minutes to an hour after EVERY MEAL!!!!

Yeah. I know some of You ain't seen a good dump in so long, You took pictures of Your last one. Hope Your family will look so fondly on photos of You after You pass on, too. But in case You don't like that idea, read on, as...

EATING DEAD STUFF SHOULD BE WHAT YOU BURY BEFORE ANYONE BURIES YOU, and I'mma tell You frank, ain't no hamburger on the EARTH as sweet as having co-operative fecal matter. Ideally, that's a soft, mushy (not diarrhetic) mass that flows out with NO pleading or begging on Your part. And? IT PRETTY MUCH DOESN'T STINK.

Yeah, that's RIIIIIGHT!! You can tell Folks, "My &%#@ don't stink," and You wouldn't be lying!!! Your sweat will also be a whole bunch less biological weapon grade.

How to achieve THAT? Well, carcass foods and byproducts are INFESTED WITH ROT. Eat 'em and they pass the gift onto YOU, where Your body is left to find any visible exit route to get rid of that, um?

dookie.

Even overcooked vegetation is a literal graveyard, only slightly better because it still does contain FIBER,whereas meat and meat byproducts has NONE. You got a toothbrush? Well Fiber is Your GUTBRUSH. And Living Food, with the living enzymes that help Your body digest the nutrients, soothing Your hunger pangs (You meat eaters are truly weaker as Your body goes on strike if You miss one lousy meal. Geez. What kinda nonsense thinking having a frantically starving body that cries for food cause what you eat has nothing, what kind of STRENGTH IS THAT?) - the living food also comes without the hetracyclic sludge that clogs Your system, which are a byproduct of overheating ANYTHING. The remaining fiber brushes out the material that INEVITABLY gets stuck in all those crevices. This is how one knows We Hue-mans are NOT carnivores nor even omnivores, as those creatures have SHORT INTESTINES. Our food is meant to be digested SLOWLY, whereas a lion's body knows it's eating FESTERING FLESH and gets that garbage out in QUICK TIME. Carnivores and Omnivores Die in quick time, too as digesting rot is hard on a body. Not that that should bother the stonecold Dead Flesh Lovers who prefer a chicken dinner to life.

Fasting is another MUST in achieving truly Gorgeous Dung. The juice fast can target specific organs, or a general water fast can flush (no pun intended, kinda) out massive quantities of imbedded refuse stuck in fatty tissue. I don't recommend COLONICS, as that flushes out EVERYTHING, and You need that good gut flora to keep the bad in check. Do cleansing enemas instead with filtered or distilled water while fasting. Distilled is best. And when starting a fast, reduce food intake slowly the day before, and return to eating just as slowly the day after.

Now, a simple Thank You will suffice for me for helping You achieve Beauty Pageant Level Dumps. PLEASE, I know I want You have Pretty Healthy Turds, but if You send me a picture? You are INSTANTLY BANNED FROM THE PAGE, PERMANENTLY. Don't try coming back. See? I Love You, but

not that much. Nobody but You can or should ever Love You like You need to be in order to have Your insides as Squeezably FRESH as Your out.

Peace and Blessed Multiple Daily and Easy Releases.

DON'T TELL MY HUSBAND. LET ME DO THAT FIRST...

 

I'm having an AFFAIR. But, No! Not and NEVER an illicit one with another Man. This affair is HEALING for myself and my entire Family, and the object of my Fiery PASSION is the 

MAGICAL COCONUT!!!!!

I have just Fallen DEEEEEEP in LOVE with all this fruit/nut/seed/drupe (it's ALL of those) does, and it's many Uses. Ever hear of those tales of a stranded man who makes everything from a couple coconut trees, 100 variations of coconut meals to a 3 story mansion hut? Well? Seeing how I sweeten with its actually HEALTHY palm sugar (tasty just like white sugar with none of the diabetes), seeing how I boost my exercise routines with Coconut Water, and have eliminated my once 3 times a year NASTY Cold Sore with Coconut Oil (I put it in my smoothies and it killed a stomach virus that was making the rounds in my home) - PLUS, I gotta try Coconut FLOUR? Well, I wouldn't be surprised if my husband didn't get just a little bit jealous. But?

THIS HEALING IS SHARE-ABLE!!! Whew. What Selfish Person couldn't share all that this MIGHTY SUPERFOOD DOES!!!! ~~~~~~~~

• Kills viruses that cause influenza, herpes, measles, hepatitis C, SARS, AIDS, and other illnesses.

• Kills bacteria that cause ulcers, throat infections, urinary tract infections, gum disease and cavities, pneumonia, and gonorrhea, and other diseases.

• Kills fungi and yeasts that cause candidiasis, ringworm, athlete’s foot, thrush, diaper rash, and other infections.

• Expels or kills tapeworms, lice, giardia, and other parasites.

• Provides a nutritional source of quick energy.

• Boosts energy and endurance, enhancing physical and athletic performance.

• Improves digestion and absorption of other nutrients including vitamins, minerals, and amino acids.

• Improves insulin secretion and utilization of blood glucose.

• Relieves stress on pancreas and enzyme systems of the body.

• Reduces symptoms associated with pancreatitis.

• Helps relieve symptoms and reduce health risks associated with diabetes.

• Reduces problems associated with malabsorption syndrome and cystic fibrosis.

• Improves calcium and magnesium absorption and supports the development of strong bones and teeth

• Helps protect against osteoporosis.

• Helps relieve symptoms associated with gallbladder disease.

• Relieves symptoms associated with Crohn’s disease, ulcerative colitis, and stomach ulcers.

• Improves digestion and bowel function.

• Relieves pain and irritation caused by hemorrhoids.

• Reduces inflammation.

• Supports tissue healing and repair.

• Supports and aids immune system function.

• Helps protect the body from breast, colon, and other cancers.

• Is heart healthy; improves cholesterol ratio reducing risk of heart disease.

• Protects arteries from injury that causes atherosclerosis and thus protects against heart disease.

• Helps prevent periodontal disease and tooth decay.

• Functions as a protective antioxidant.

• Helps to protect the body from harmful free radicals that promote premature aging and degenerative disease.

• Does not deplete the body’s antioxidant reserves like other oils do.

• Improves utilization of essential fatty acids and protects them from oxidation.

• Helps relieve symptoms associated with chronic fatigue syndrome.

• Relieves symptoms associated with benign prostatic hyperplasia (prostate enlargement).

• Reduces epileptic seizures.

• Helps protect against kidney disease and bladder infections.

• Dissolves kidney stones.

• Helps prevent liver disease.

• Is lower in calories than all other fats.

• Supports thyroid function.

• Promotes loss of excess weight by increasing metabolic rate.

• Is utilized by the body to produce energy in preference to being stored as body fat like other dietary fats.

• Helps prevent obesity and overweight problems.

• Applied topically helps to form a chemical barrier on the skin to ward of infection.

• Reduces symptoms associated the psoriasis, eczema, and dermatitis.

• Supports the natural chemical balance of the skin.

• Softens skin and helps relieve dryness and flaking.

• Prevents wrinkles, sagging skin, and age spots.

• Promotes healthy looking hair and complexion.

• Provides protection form damaging effects of ultraviolet radiation form the sun.

• Helps control dandruff.

• Does not form harmful by-products when heated to normal cooking temperature like other vegetable oils do.

• Has no harmful or discomforting side effects.

• Is completely non-toxic to humans.

Now. I doubt You made it to the bottom of this list, cause after reading even half of it, You've run off to get Yourself some COCONUTS. Look at U havin' an affair!  OOooOOoooOOOOooOOO!!! I'm TELLLLLLIN' Your spouse, unless You share....